...baby gender/update...

Everyone asks the question "So, what's new with you guys? What have you been up to?" Seriously. Nothing. Or at least that's what I always want to say. I guess I tried a new recipe last night, and another one of our goldfish died this morning (but really..Jason got 14 goldfish as a white elephant gift at work and the past few days they are suddenly dying one by one). The nice thing about being pregnant is there are so many new fun things that do get to happen, so I have been able to share about that lately! So, for those of you who are sick of reading about every one's pregnancies and what not, then you should probably wait to read our blog until after the baby comes, because, unfortunately, that is what is happening with us right now!

We set the date. On February 11th we will finally find out if our little mini is a he or a she! We decided to be like everyone else these days and throw a gender reveal party. Call me a cliche, but I love the idea of celebrating all the exciting moments in pregnancy! Not only is it so fun to make each milestone a big memory, but it really helps me to have things to look forward to. Since I've been sick all the time, it really helps to be reminded that it is the most important reason I will ever have for feeling so crappy.

Anyway, I decided to put a poll on the blog for people to place their guesses. I know I still have a month to find out, but I am just so excited!! I also saw this super cute idea on a few different blogs recently where people have been updating their pregnancy through a list of fill in the blank questions, and since I'm in bed most days, I figured it would be something fun to pass the time.

WEEKS?: As of today I am 16 weeks and 4 days along.

WEIGHT GAINED?: I actually lost a pound and was down to 109 but at my last visit it showed me at 110, so woo hoo! Doc said I should start putting on weight easier from here on out.

SYMPTOMS?: When am I not having symptoms really? I have had major morning sickness up until the past week. I am not as nauseous, mostly headaches all the time and fatigue.

MOVEMENT?: I felt the baby for the first time last night! And no, it was not gas, haha. It was the strangest and coolest thing I've ever felt. I haven't felt anything since, it was just the one time. I can't wait to feel the baby more frequently.

FOOD CRAVINGS?: Two weeks ago it was Mac and Cheese. This past week it's been grilled cheese sandwiches with milk.

FOOD AVERSION?: Not really aversions to specific foods, but the smell of refrigerated (cold) food makes me sick to my stomach. Cooking has been a little bit of a battle lately! Once it's warmed up/ cooked I can handle it.

SLEEP?: Except for the hunger pangs and constant need to go to the bathroom every couple hours during the night, the sleep is much better now that I have fifty pillows on my side of the bed (which, really, is the whole bed).

STRETCH MARKS?: None yet, but we'll see!

BELLY BUTTON, IN OR OUT?: In, but Jason thinks it's fun to see my belly button stretch out so he can see how "interesting" it looks. Haha

HAPPY OR MOODY?: Both! For quite a while I was feeling very emotional, I still am at times. But, I'm happy to say, it's easing up a bit! I even dropped a heavy pan lid on my head the other day and didn't cry, even when Jason come running over after seeing it happen and held me like I was about to burst in to tears..I fought those tears! That's progress people.

MISS ANYTHING?: Other than feeling well enough to get out of the house and go to work, school, and hang out more frequently, not missing much. 

LOOKING FORWARD TO: Finding out the gender of our mini, so I can start preparing better! And being able to see them on the ultrasound again, and see how much they've grown. 

Well, that's pretty much it for now! Just a quick shout out to Jason. He has had a lot of weight on his shoulders lately with his full load. He is doing awesome in the nursing program, while working full time and fulfilling his calling in the bishopric. I am so proud of him and so grateful to have such a supportive, kind, hard working man as my husband. I love you hun!!

...11 weeks...

Well, as of today I am 11 weeks and 4 days along. We had our second doctor's appointment today for baby and got to listen to their little heart beat. We found it pretty quickly but they kept moving around so the nurse had to keep searching for them. I'm convinced that our baby is taking advantage of how much space they have right now to play hide and seek! The doctor told us that everything is looking good so far, my labs came back just fine. I have lost a little weight ( I'm sure from being so sick ) but he said it's not anything to be concerned about right now, which is a relief!

Now, I was going to post these a while ago but I have not found the motivation to do it until now! I video taped revealing our pregnancy to immediate family so I could keep the memories, BUT, I, being really careless and not technology savvy, accidentally deleted revealing to my mom and my two brothers. I cried... a LOT...when I found out what I did. So, I'll just have to tell you how I did it.

For my mom and younger brother, the plan was that my brother, Buck, would doorbell ditch our house leaving a gift at the door ( so my mom wouldn't know it was from us ), but unfortunately she noticed the camera hidden in our kitchen and started asking what we were recording, so it kind of blew our cover. We gave her the gift anyway. It had a little note about a little pumpkin joining the family and her new name she would be given next summer. The name reads "Darling", which is a very special name in our family that belonged to my amazing great grandmother, a name that I would love for my kids to call my mom now. Here are pictures from that night ( at least I still have pictures right? )

For my other brother, Cameron, I had been texting him telling him I needed to sit down and talk with him. He was convinced that it had to do with an ex girlfriend because I wouldn't tell him over the phone and kept saying "we just need to talk in person" every time he asked what was going on. So, he came over and I had set up the camera ( better than the first time ). I told him he needed to sit down and panicked, because I didn't really prepare how I was going to actually break the news, so I, sounding a little crazy, started to say "Once upon a time, Jason and I met and fell in love...and now...we're having a baby!!" The look on his face was priceless, it went from total confusion to a big smile. I wish I had that on video still.

Here are the texts I received from my Dad, who was out of town at the time and had to be told over the phone, as well as from my sister.

When we told Jason's family. We told his parents by giving his Mom a cute little children's book as part of her birthday gift, then told his sister and her family over skype. Also, I'm sure my sister in law, Tiffanie, isn't as angry as she sounds about our announcement! And, turns out we weren't actually pregnant the night she is talking about :) I was just really hungry that night I guess, call me miss piggy!

                                                                                  

Here is a couple from filming aunts, we wanted to film more people but everyone was all over the place so it was hard!

     And last but not least when I announced it to my sweet husband. This one definitely did not turn out like I wanted it to. I set up a scavenger hunt of notes leading to his anniversary "present", but I totally messed up on the order in my excitement, I was a little upset, but oh well! Jas had actually asked me two days earlier if he could have his gift ( that was the day I took my first test that showed up positive, but it was so faint that I didn't feel totally sure I wanted to tell him and find out it wasn't correct). He kept saying "I need this, just give it to me!" and I would say "But what if you don't like it, what if you're disappointed??" and he would say "I PROMISE I will love it! I know I will! I need you to give me my present!" He totally knew what was going on but I was so nervous to let him down I made myself wait and take another test two days later. Anyway, here it is.

(Ok, this is really depressing, it won't upload the video of Jason, I will keep trying to figure it out and hopefully get it up here soon!)

There were quite a few other reveals that are special so us, but we're going to keep them special just to us :).

...so it begins...

Man...this pregnancy is already kicking my butt and I am still just in the beginning. First of all..wait what?! It still sounds so crazy to me to even think about the fact that I am pregnant. It's embarrassing to admit..but, after the first initial positive, I seriously took (in complete honesty) probably like ten or so pregnancy tests (after the first million I have taken ever since I got married..let's be honest married ladies..who doesn't get a little test happy?) because I just couldn't believe it. I even took one the night before our first doctor's appointment because I was nervous that my body was playing tricks on me and it wasn't real. I seriously thought when they did the ultra sound that there would be nothing there. But, thankfully, we did see our wonderful little peanut and their teeny tiny heart beating so fast.

Seeing our little one was the most surreal feeling. It seriously all felt like a dream. It's a similar feeling to the day I married Jason, everything felt like such a blur, I couldn't quite comprehend what was happening because I couldn't believe I was really marrying the man of my dreams. But this...this is like that times one hundred thousand. Every single day I wake up and have to go look at the sonogram of our mini Cooper because I can't believe they are really there. I think it's easier to feel in denial too when I'm not showing yet. Even all the sickness I have had...it just hasn't registered quite fully that it's because my body is working on creating another human being.

Speaking of sickness...oh my goodness. For those who are close to me, you know this already...but oh my heck child!! You are making me absolutely miserable right now! I am going to be one hundred percent honest right now, at the risk of sounding selfish and ungrateful, I am having the hardest time with everything these days.

1.  I am an emotional wreck. Today Jason got to go to Chili's with his classmates from the nursing program to celebrate the last day of their first semester of clinical's. I didn't admit this to him at the time... but, he came home and showered before leaving for work after the lunch, and I literally cried because why? Because he didn't have any leftovers. Honestly. Every little thing makes me just want to cry. I have even sat in our apartment and out of no where start crying and I have actually, out loud, asked myself what in the world is happening to me.

2. I feel like crap all. the. time. A few weeks ago I started getting so sick that I could hardly get out of bed because I was so exhausted and could not keep any food down. I had to take a break from school and from work because I was having the hardest time doing anything. Even laying around feels like a lot of work sometimes because of how uncomfortable I am, which is ridiculous. I had to start taking this medication called Zofran, which is generally prescribed to chemo patients for nausea. It has helped a TON. I still throw up sometimes and I always feel tired and sick, but seriously..being able to keep some food down is like heaven these days.

3. Change. I am starting to freak out. It is most likely all these hormones that are making me really scared, but I am terrified. This is something I have always wanted. I always knew I wanted to get married someday and start a family. I always looked forward to the day I would be able to be pregnant (minus the whole labor and delivery thing) and be able to see the sweet little angels that my awesome Heavenly Father saved for me. This is something Jason and I have prayed about constantly over the past couple years and it's something we took very seriously. It took a lot for us to decide to have a baby. We are still very young and we have a lot to accomplish in our lives, namely finishing school. We just felt very strongly that it was time. For a while we were pulled back and forth, wanting to make sure we did what we were supposed to according to God's will and not our own...but that's a story for another day.
I am really scared of having to go through labor, and I have really started to doubt in my abilities to become a good mother. I want to give my baby everything I have, and I want to do everything I can for them, and I have been really struggling to feel like I can do that. Partly because I have been so sick and haven't been able to go to work and school, which right now in my mind, is exactly what I need to be doing to ensure that my child can have the best life. And I can't even do that? It is the worst feeling. I feel like I'm being such a burden on those around me. But, I am so lucky, and I have some incredible people in my life.

My husband. My amazing, wonderful, handsome, loving, kind, sweet, incredible husband. He has seriously been my rock. I cannot begin to express how much I love him. He is human and he stresses about things, he gets over-worked and school and his job but when it comes to this baby...this baby is his world. He continues to tell me daily "I am here for you. I am going to make everything okay." and I feel the fear and the anxiety begin to melt. You guys, I don't know how I did it, but I found him, and he is mine for eternity. I am so so so blessed. I have felt like nothing but stress for him these days as I have had to rest at home constantly, but he has not once complained. He has not once allowed me to bring him down or make him feel worried. He has been so positive and so loving that I just can't believe people like him exist. This baby is the luckiest, they have Superman as their Daddy.

My family. My family has been a huge support to us. My mom is extremely excited and she is constantly checking up on me and asking if there is anything she can do. My dad has done the same, making sure we are taken care of. My in-laws have been so supportive and awesome too. They are so loving and gracious. I am so grateful for all of them. I don't know that I could ever get through all of this without them. It definitely is a relief knowing I can call any one of them up and they would be there for me in a heartbeat.

Now, I know I have rambled and complained, but when it comes down to it, I really am so happy, nervous and frightened, but so so so happy. Funny how you can feel both at the same time. I already love my little one so much. I can't believe how much our baby has blessed us already, I have never felt so close to husband and my family as I do now. I am so excited for this adventure and I am so grateful to have been given the best calling in the world, Mom.

...this thanksgiving...

With Thanksgiving two weeks away we have SO much on our minds that we are thankful for! Just to name a few...

(Jason): I am thankful for my family, my education, my testimony, and my friends.

(Brittanie): I am thankful for my home, my family, my friends, my puppy (the one I dream about having, and also my big ol' puppy back at home), and the gospel.

We absolutely love this time of year. The holidays are the greatest, getting to spend quality time with family and friends, eating good food, and stopping to reflect on what's really important in this life.

We have been so blessed to be close to both of our parents, it can be challenging when trying to be at every event and dinner but overall we are extremely grateful for the love and support we have so close by. It has been so fun to grow closer to both families as we begin our own. You really don't realize how wonderful your parents are until you leave home. We owe so much to them for all have done and continue to do for us. We love you guys!!

We are really filled with so much gratitude for our family and the joy and love they bring in to our life together. We are especially grateful to be able to spend this family-oriented time of year celebrating the upcoming arrival of the newest addition to the Cooper family...

We are unbelievably excited to announce the arrival of Baby Cooper! Joining us Summer of 2014! Mostly we say "Summer" because they're due the end of June, and we're worried that the baby will decide to take their sweet time and not arrive until July, so "Summer" sounds a little better!

"The challenges ahead of me seem a lot easier now knowing my child is on the way. It motivates me to do and be better for them. I am so excited!" -Jason

"I am still in disbelief...but in a good way! It seriously makes me smile all day long hearing Jason repeatedly tell me how excited he is and how awesome it feels to know he is going to be a Dad. I am already so in love with the little family we are beginning!" -Brittanie

Surprise!!!