My Garden

Each summer that we have lived in our current apartment (this will be the second) I get the urge to garden. We have a decent sized section of dirt in front that fills with weeds and it is quite the eye sore. I can't help but feel a need to make it look better. Last year was my first time trying, and I was not very successful, but it still made me feel good trying! I was determined to try again this year when I received garden flowers for Mother's Day from my parents and grandpa. My dad brought by some materials to help and today Jason and I got to work.

While we tilled the soil I stopped, looked at Jas, and said "Who would have thought I would end up choosing to work in a garden for fun!?" We went on to discuss how in my childhood I hated working outdoors...and indoors...any kind of work really. I had my interests and I wanted to spend all my time on those.

The conversation got a little further and I talked about how on Mother's Day I noticed several women sharing how they always knew they wanted to be a mom. That when they were little and were asked what they wanted to be when they grew up they would say "A mom!" Not me. I had this vision that I would become famous, whether on Broadway or the big screen, it didn't matter, either would do. I wanted to become famous, live an "easy life", date some hot guy, probably get married, and spend my time having fun. MAYBE have one child.. if it fit in to my life. HA!

Isn't it funny how time and experience can change so much? I never really pictured being a stay at home mom, or a mom in general. I never (in my wildest dreams!!) pictured enjoying house work and yard work. I never imagined that the most important things to me would become my home and my family. But it happened and I am so grateful it did!

Carrie Underwood's song "What I Never Knew I Always Wanted" pretty much sums up how I feel. "Life has a way of showing you just what you need and who you were made to be". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wurcrS4b5w

My life has not turned out how I thought it would. It is so much better.

Maybe it's those years of my parents trying to teach me the value of hard work finally blossoming. Maybe someone brainwashed me. Who knows! I don't care, because I am loving it. I have never felt so secure, so consistently happy, so "myself" as I do now where I am at in life.

This is my life. To some it may not look like much, it may even appear to be ugly. To me it is my precious little garden. It is a work in progress. We have not yet planted all of our flowers, and the ones we have are small and have yet to grow to their potential. We have not yet finished building a small deck to sit on during the summer nights. But eventually it will all come together (or it may even fall apart!). The point is that in the end a lot of hard work, love, care, and help from others will have gone in to this garden.

I am grateful for all I have, all I have become, and all that is ahead of me.